Shit Mountain, Shit Out A Hero Who Shined

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As the Sun rises on shit mountain, the birds shitting over the rainbow sing a shitty tune. simultaneously the deathly breeze swings about another shitty drift of change, all because some shit head has found hope in all the wrong places. Deep, deep down into the butt hole of shit mountain. Resides and hides a shit mining shaft and home to The shit cave people. These unique people have been threw some exceptional shit. The shit tribe has found more than nine hundred and twenty shitty uses for human shit. Thirty three thousand if you include all mammal shit. The shit tribe is very proud. So proud in fact that, they use shit for medical, educational and sexual lubricant. They have made it illegal not to eat shit, at least once a week. This offence is punishable by the entire village Shitting on your head. It’s no surprise that, dingle berry’s are their currency. The Greatest of Shit warriors often charge into battle covered in shit head to toe, butt naked, all while shitting and dripping with the community shit. There will be no mercy for their victims. This shit army has no honor, respect or decency. They are merely nothing more than shit covered savages ready to fuck the shit out of your shit hole till you shit uncontrollably. Shit soldiers capture civilians and ship them to shitting camps. This is where they will harvest you of your shit till you shit yourself to death…

This Shit defecation camp is also where our story starts.Jumping to year 4-20-4565 The shit apocalypse is a world turned upside down, literally the bloody sewer runs the streets like a rapid bull run. The turds has cross bred with bats and rats. The tampons, gold fish and turtles has intertwined into a hideous land leach that born pregnant. The shitty tampon population is out of control and a rising danger to the entire world…

“Everything is shit, shitty, shittier and ain’t shit getting better”

said a old man chained to the wall across from me as he laughed obnoxiously. My vision is blurry it’s likely due to the bird shit in my eyes. Through the shit, I watched the old shit eater as he continued to ramble on choking on shit in between sentences. I can’t remember where nor who i am. The shit was unbearable, unconsciously I drifted into a day dream, i was in a beautiful palace surround by beautiful people, whom were all waiting for me to speak. Just as i began Thunder from a shit storm interrupted me. The clouds emptied their bladders pouring down unbelievably, scattered diarrhea showers. The humid wet shit wind’s blew tremendous amounts of shit over us all something like a shit storm blanket. I guess after so long in the shit, it almost becomes comforting…

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It looks like the shit has finally hit the fan.

As i awoke startled and distressed the pain in my wrist were unbelievable. Hanging on them while i slept has cut off the circulation. I was up all night Screaming for help, I cried and yelled while gargling shit for days. Eventually the guards got tired of my shit. 2 days ago they started gathering all the shit from all the other inmates and shoveling piles into my cell, i am currently waste deep in shit. I have no hope now. I’m even hungry enough that i’m considering eating shit. Looking over at the chains binding me to the old cold shit covered wall. I think to myself, is this it? will i die drowning in shit chained to a wall? what does it all mean? Suddenly out of no where the wall in front of me abruptly explodes and with it the shit eater directly across from me popped liked a shit filled water balloon. Leaving Warm shit running over my face, streaming into my mouth and flooding my eyes. I never thought i’d say the moment was glorious righteous and perfect but after consuming the shit i had enough energy to fight again. The explosion was from a neighboring shit eating city. Boy was i happy to see them raging war on the ones who held me captive…

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I watched eagerly through the crumbling wall as the new shit commander slayed the shitty captain who had been instigating the torturer, whom had been shoveling the shit on me for the last 2 dreadful days. Laughing with the comfort of knowing that fucker is dead. Its almost like i got a win, i feel like i have a shot at getting out of here. With all my might i began Slamming and jerking against the chains again and again. I soon noticed the bolts to my chains had come lose after the explosion The bricks were weakened, and i was beginning to wiggle free.Falling on my face a few times, I struggled to regained my balance. I haven’t eating anything besides shit nor have i stood on my own 2 feet for days. I’m realizing it doesn’t feel good to be back. I have so much work to do and so little time. Painful Memories have been jumping back to me here and there. I now know i am the good guy here to save the world from the shit apocalypse. I also know that i have failed my mission, been erased and left for dead…

TO BE CONTINUED…

Don’t Freak, I Got More Great Shitty Stories For YOU Listed Below

4. Shinning Shit Taken From Above

3. The Sun Shined On That Shit

2. No More Sunshine On Shit Mountain ?

1. Sunshine On Shit Mountain

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Thanks For Reading Don’t Forget to share this shit!

Sincerely the guy writing this shit

 

 

 

 

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